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What is The Occupation Thesaurus?  In a word, it’s empowering, and in a second word, it is exciting.

The first 14% of the book provides a comprehensive and considerably in-depth overview of the importance of characters’ occupations and, among other aspects, the ways in which to use those occupations to create tension and conflict and to reveal the characters’ personalities and motives, without having to always tell readers these things. 
Excellent examples are given to help stimulate creativity and encourage manipulations of occupations based on the author’s needs in a given story.  There are lots of balls a person can run with in this first section.

While a person might be able to scour the internet via endless searching and blog-visiting to piece together the thorough and engaging material provided in this section of the book, the question that comes to mind is: why bother?  So much thought-provoking and detailed information packaged in one easy reference is too empowering to pass up for more time-consuming alternatives.  

Moving on into the exciting part leads to the remainder of the book.  One key reason why this section is exciting is because of all the specifics it provides. Essential elements for each occupation include: “necessary training,” “useful skills, talents or abilities,” “helpful characters or traits,” and four or five additional topics all geared to help authors integrate occupation into their stories in a manner that adds credibility. Whether the character is a glassblower or a secret-service agent, there’s an applicable section on such emotional considerations as “sources of friction,” “how the occupation might impact the character’s needs” and “twisting the fictional stereotypes.”

A second key reason why this section is exciting is because a person can scroll through the various occupations and all the related content and definitely be inspired with ways to expand upon what has already been given.

Moreover, if authors have an occupation in mind that’s not listed, there’s a blank template included at the end of the thesaurus section.  Authors can use the template and write out that occupation in the same manner the others are presented so they’ll have a well-rounded source from which to work.
The book states that “the information in this thesaurus was gathered from different sources, and many of the entries were vetted by people with experience in that field.”  At the same time, authors are encouraged to take into consideration how regional differences can and will impact certain jobs.

Quite frankly, in a day and time, when authors are seeking to write a steady stream of books to meet their readers’ demand for a steady stream of books to read, a tool—and yes, it is a tool—a tool like The Occupation Thesaurus is a must-have reference source.

The book is available right now at Amazon and other major retailers. ​

The chief functions of dialogue in the story are to advance the plot and/or educate readers as to the nature of characters. You don’t want to bottleneck these important jobs by unnecessary attempts to include certain words that sound more like the way people speak every day.

Given the function of dialogue in fiction, ask yourself: what do readers get out of every one of my characters saying “Well” all the time? Does having them say “Well” all the time do anything to provide character-insight or to distinguish the way one character speaks from the way every other character speaks? Does “Well” advance the plot of the story?

Consider this example:

“Tom, you going to lunch now?”

Okay, here it comes. “Well, I was thinking about it.”

“Well, if you do decide to go, can you pick me up something?” Robert patted his pockets.  “I’ll have to straighten up with you on Friday.”

“Well, I don’t think I have enough on me?”

“Well, okay, I understand.”

Granted, while I did get some character-insight in there, all the word “Well” did in this example was introduce what I call excessive repetition. If all throughout your book, all your characters are “welling,” then eventually your dialogue, no matter the subject matter, begins to sound monotonous. You are literally draining away readers’ interest with this kind of repetition. For my part, I have reached a point where I couldn’t read another line of dialogue that included the word “Well.” The end result was another book tossed in the DNF garbage bin. 

Now, you might have one particular character that uses this word all the time. In addition, you might have a staller or an evader who uses it.

“Listen, babe, you got those shirts pressed, right? Because I’ll need them first thing when we open.” 

“Well . . . I . . . uh.”

Even in this instance, you could leave “Well” out, but at least in this example, the use of the word is not entirely excess verbiage. 

To quickly summarize: keep this important point in mind:

More than ever readers want to be totally engrossed in a story. They are demanding a constant return on
investment of their time and/or money in your book.

Write your dialogue with the reader’s expectation in mind. The reader expects to come away from each conversation possibly having learned something new or something more about the characters or having learned more about what’s going on in the story or even having become more confused about what’s going on because it’s not yet time to remove those clouds of confusion.

Readers also expect dialogue to be engaging and to the point. They don’t care about re-creations of the monotonous “Wells” heard in everyday life. They are not reading to be re-immersed in monotony, but to escape it.

Your don’t-hesitate-to-update tip: If you’ve uploaded an e-book full of too much “welling,” don’t hesitate to get those “Wells” out of there and upload a revised edition.

​Thanks for reading. Hope this info was helpful. Your questions and comments are welcome.
 
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Is Your Book Blurb Too Blabby?

Thanks so much for your interest in this service.  Having completed my studies in Creative Writing, workshopped many stories, performed numerous betareadings  and studied Novel Writing, which always requires ongoing study, I can provide a comprehensive evaluation of your novel with which you will be thrilled. Nothing takes the place of the satisfaction and relief you experience when you know you’ve fixed those major errors in your story BEFORE you published it. 

ABOUT MY EVALUATION PROCEDURE
I tend to demand more than the average reader from a work of fiction. Many readers accept stories that are less than satisfying by arguing that it's the author's first book or maybe the next will be better.  I don't agree with these kinds of excuses.  Certain errors are made over and over again, and if not caught in time, might never be corrected. Consequently, repetition in its varied forms, giving away too early information driving the tension in your story, unjustifiable coincidences and obvious contrivances are aspects to which I pay close attention. These details are in addition to the areas I discuss below.  

Read Kevis Hendrickson's comments on my extensive betareading and manuscript evaluation of Rogue Hunter 3: Life Force.


"I’m always looking to up my game as a writer and have I’ve worked with many professional editors, script consultants, and top-notch beta readers to make my books as good as they can be. Kathy stands out from the pack as a unique breed of editor who can dissect a story to see where it has gone wrong or can be improved. Her feedback was instrumental in giving me the painstakingly detailed insight I needed to write what has become my highest rated book. Without her help, my book would have been the poorer for it. I would recommend her services in a heartbeat to any writer who is looking for an editor who can help them turn a good story into a great one."


My evaluation will focus on specific areas.

BAD CHAPTER BREAKS AND ENDINGS. This is a major problem for may books. It's extremely important to know how to end a chapter without emotionally disengaging readers. Emotional disconnection is more common in books now than ever before. 

CHARACTERS
I will evaluate your main characters with regard to their depth and development and audience appeal. I will also examine secondary characters to see if their presence works for or against your story. I also check for consistency in the behavior of your characters.

DIALOGUE
I specialize in dialogue and will focus on getting rid of it and added it as needed as well as the use of too many speaker tags, the wrong tags, and overall dialogue mechanics.

 PLOT
I look for those actions that drain away tension and that cause your story to veer off track. I also check for implausibility, contrivances, and too much “telling” vs. “showing.” In addition,  I check pacing, making note of when your story moves too slow or too fast and at what points readers might lose interest. 

TOO MUCH TELLING 
It's easy to slip into too much narration as opposed to showing. However, it's important to know what to show and when telling is better than showing. There are also small overlooked instances of telling that fatigue readers' interest because these kinds are another form of repetition. 

TOO MUCH WAS-ING
Getting rid of "was" statements and replacing passive verbs with the right actions verbs is more than a little important. Whatever the genre of your story, too much was-ing can slow it down. At the same time, there are instances in which this construction makes sense and not using it pulls readers out of the story because the sentence doesn't make sense or doesn't describe what is actually happening. 

ANYTHING ELSE THAT ISN'T WORKING
Despite the creative freedom writing a story offers, there are attempts made to include things in a story that just don't work. Things like too much backstory; too much history; too much platforming and preaching; dwelling overlong on a point or theme or subject being shared with the readers and other issues spotted in the course of evaluating your story. 

GRAMMAR
While this M.E. service doesn’t include  correcting  grammar and punctuation, if your story needs this, I’ll let you know. In addition, as I am going through your manuscript, I'll point many common grammatical errors if they are present in your book (e.g.: missing words, typos, missing hyphens, wrong-word usage; wrong homonym usage). It is amazing how many errors are eliminated this way.

RECOMMENDATIONS
I’ll make recommendations to you concerning books you need to read to help improve your manuscript, especially if you don’t have monies for the various levels of editing.

Romance writer, Lizabeth Scott and I worked together on Sweet Temptation and her latest release, Sweet Destiny.

"I found Kathy's editing services to be top notch. She guided me through drilling down my plot and characters to get the very best results. Kathy is extremely knowledgeable and supplied valuable insight into "keeping it real." She never tried to take "my" voice from the story. I am very satisfied with the services and product I developed. Yes, I will use Kathy again. She already has my next story!" 

METHOD OF FEEDBACK
Instead of tracking, I write my comments right in your document.  At the end of the document, you will receive a write-up of any additional information that I can provide.

An evaluation will probably take from 4 to 9 weeks, depending on the length of the book and the extent to which I need to offer feedback.  Feedback is sent to you on a weekly basis so you don't have to wait until the job is completed before you can start revising. 

I like to over-deliver, so if I see other areas of your story that need to be addressed, I’ll let you know.  If you have some specific concerns, let me know in advance what they are. 

As I evaluate your manuscript, I will be in contact with you so we can discuss the book. This communication is important so that I can offer assistance that will help you to achieve the goal you want to achieve with your book. I know how important it is to maintain the heart-and-soul of your story while making it the kind of book that readers won't be able to resist sharing. 

In the Acknowledgments for Pregnant Future, author, Joy Lo-Bamijoko wrote:

"Kathy Golden was the first to evaluate my manuscript after Harmony. By her going through my manuscript, I came to understand why I was not so happy with it.  A lot of issues I was too lazy to address came to light. She suggested I send the manuscript to more readers, and so I did.  In the end, again, I sent my manuscript back to Kathy for a final proof. Thank you, Kathy. Your suggestions have greatly improved my manuscript." 

Joy also thanked me for my thorough evaluation of her short story collection: VAGARIES OF LIFE AND : GIRLS’ TALK

ONE OF MY MAIN OBJECTIVES is to help authors reach a place where they will recognize the corrections needed in their manuscripts so that an evaluation won't be necessary for every book. It is an objective I believe to be achievable, and I'll help you to become consciously aware of and thus eliminate the issues that keep your books from being the best representations of your writing skills. 

PAYMENT

Payment is due in full for your evaluation when you order it.

PRICING IS $210 PER 30,000 WORDS or a price per word fee of .007. There is a minimum charge of $30. 

If you want to pay for your evaluation in installments, then contact me for details. 

If you have any questions, let me know. I look forward to working with you. 

CONTACT ME
Use the form below to reach me, and we'll get started on working together to make your book the best that it can be. 

UPDATE:

Since Amazon now bases KU payouts on page reads, shorter books are not so much the way to go unless you make the adjust many savvy short-book-writing authors have gone.  Their books are still short, but they are combining those books into sets. I like this idea, especially since I believe when an author has said all he/she has to say in a story, it's better to end that story than to bog it down with excessive words. Let's talk. Share your thoughts on this. 
Amazon’s unleashing of Kindle Unlimited (KU) has some indie authors, whose books are enrolled in KDP Select/KU,  thinking that publishing shorter novels might be the only way they’ll earn what their books are worth. There are at least two reasons they’ve come to this conclusion. The first is Amazon’s two-tier payment system. Word has it that while traditionally published authors and certain best-selling indie authors will be paid full-price when subscribers borrow their books, the majority of indie authors will be paid an unknown amount from the KDP Select Global Fund set aside each month by Amazon.

Since the pool has been averaging payouts between $1.80 and $2.00, novels normally selling above $2.00 will experience a loss in revenue. Add to this fact, the requirement that subscribers to Kindle Unlimited Books must read over 10% of a book for an author to be paid anything at all, and it’s easy to see why some indies are considering breaking up their longer books into shorter ones or just writing short novels. Their reasoning: with fewer pages to traverse in order to cover over 10%, there’s an increased chance that subscribers will consume at least that much.  In addition, a novel in KU that is divided into three parts, with each part earning a potential $2.00, will hopefully minimize royalty loss.

Whether this is a sound strategy or not, if you plan to experiment with it, there are some important details to keep in mind; the foremost of which is that not all the people you want to read your books are going to be KU subscribers.  A second important fact is that most readers—for our purposes, non-KU folks—do not like short novels that those readers feel should just be one large book.  So you need to ensure that your efforts to create books that theoretically will give you the upper hand in Kindle Unlimited don’t destroy your relationship with readers who are not subscribers.

I suggest if you’re breaking up your three- or four-hundred page book into three smaller books that you name them accordingly: part one, part two, and part three. At the same time, you’ll want to have a separate e-book containing all three books at a price less costly than buying the individual books. This bundle would not be in Kindle Unlimited, and readers who are not subscribers wouldn’t feel forced to purchase three smaller books to read your complete story. I’ve come across several authors already implementing this strategy.

 For the most part, KU subscribers won’t have a reason to care that the book is divided into three parts since they’re not paying for the individual installments. Still, they need to know that the plot is spread out over several books and that they can purchase all three books in a single bundle. Be sure to include that information in the book descriptions and to create a page in the e-books that tells readers that the story has been divided up.

This knowledge is also needed by non-subscribers who, unaware of the bundle, might end up purchasing the three separate books. You might think: Well, that’s great for me. Maybe so, until purchasers learn that they could have bought all three books for the lesser price. And yes, they will blame you for the fact that they didn’t see that bundle advertised under “Frequently bought together” or on your author’s page.

Another point to keep in mind: if Part One has a cliffhanger, then you need to state that right from the beginning: this is a three-part book, and this first part has a cliffhanger. Why do you need to state it? Because some subscribers might download the first part and then not have access to downloading the second book when they are hanging off that cliff with your characters. Needless to say, their ire won’t bode well for positive reviews.

Include comments about cliffhangers and the fact that your story is covered over three small books, both in the description’s section on the book’s page and at the beginning of each e-book. You might not think it’s necessary to put the information in both places, but it is. 

I recently came across a book that I was interested in reading. Since I check all the star ratings from 5 to 1, I noticed that readers kept giving the book 1-star reviews and saying the author didn’t let them know that there were creatures of the night in the book. When I read the book description, the first line plainly stated that fact. However, the preview of the kindle book made no mention of it.  I can’t say I blame the people for not reading the book description; anymore, you find everything in that designated area except a description of the book! Nevertheless, from this example and no doubt from some of your own personal experience, you can see the importance of keeping readers informed through every opportunity available to you.

Feel free to share your comments below. However, I must ask you to stay on topic. There is much debate about whether or not authors should participate in Kindle Unlimited. However, that debate is not the focus of this article. If you have questions or suggestions relative to what is discussed here or ways to make Kindle Unlimited work better for authors who are participating in it, then please share them.

 

How to write a book blurb is a challenge for many authors. Yet these mini insights greatly influence whether or not readers will further investigate your book. When seeking an incentive to buy a novel, the first thing I focus on is the book blurb. Yet, lately, I hesitate to read blurbs because they give away too much of the story and too many details I want to discover for myself. This unfortunate practice is multiplying because many authors read these over-generous descriptions and feel compelled to write a similar one for their own books. A book blurb is not a summary, and a large summarized portion of the story is not a good way to encourage readers to make a purchase. Mastering how to write a book blurb is a skill every author should acquire.   

Consider the following loaded description, which is not that uncommon:

Amanda, the eldest of three daughters whose father was thrown from a horse and instantly killed, is in urgent need of a husband.  But Fate is not without some mercy. Amanda meets Louis, and it’s love at first sight. They marry, and then tragedy strikes again. The bond of Amanda and Louis’s recent union is not strong enough, and one day, Amanda discovers he has abandoned her.  Years later, he returns, and Amanda can’t deny how much she still loves him. But can she forgive him?  Will she ever be able to trust him?

The moment he lays eyes on her, Louis knows he has to have Amanda. She doesn't need a dowry; he has plenty of money.  Never mind that some of his family members think her unsuitable. When Amanda agrees to marry him, he’s the happiest man in all of London.  But when tragedy befalls them, he has no choice but to leave her.  Three years later, he returns, knowing there’s every chance Amanda doesn't want him back. But he’s determined to earn her trust and hopefully, her love.

Perhaps A Second Chance (written by an author wishing to remain anonymous) is Amanda and Louis’s heartbreaking and heartwarming story. Can they overcome their difficult past and find happiness with each other again?

Personally, I would only start reading this book if I opened the preview and the story began no more than a chapter or so before Louis’s return to Amanda.   Why?  Because all the highpoints of the events that took place prior to his return have been told to me, and I would just as soon learn more about them through back story. However, odds are the story will not begin anywhere near this event.

Authors write blurbs like this one and think to lure readers into buying their books due to an imperative need to know what the tragedy was, why Louis left, and perhaps a need to empathize with the characters’ angst.  Some authors think once readers begin the story, they’ll be dazzled by impressive dialogue and drama and unforgettable characters. The problem is readers possess too many facts beforehand to be impressed or dazzled.  

Suppose the book began by introducing readers to Amanda’s loving father surrounded by his daughters. Next would come his tragic death, followed by Amanda’s marriage, her second tragedy, and her husband’s abandonment.  Regardless of how dramatically this material is brought to life, for at least the first twenty-five- to fifty-percent of the book, readers are trudging through the same facts they've already read about in the description.  It’s like going to a surprise party that isn't a surprise because someone has already spoiled it for you.

Any decent party will have refreshments and sweets that can serve as compensation for the deprived thrill of surprise.  However, in a book, even though readers might not consciously register it, this absence of surprise translates into low-wattage interest and comments like: “This story is all right, but I’m having trouble getting into it.” At the same time, if the author is lucky, those readers persevere until something happens in the story that’s news to them. Nevertheless, the lag in their initial enjoyment could cost the author many a high-starred review or the coveted “You gotta read this book!” tweets.

I once DNF’d a book because I had learned too much about the plot from the description. This particular description was three or four lengthy-paragraphs long and covered a number of years as well as some major character interactions.  When I started reading the story, I found the characters interesting, and the dialogue worked. However, I couldn't sympathize with anything that threatened the hero and heroine because I already knew they had overcome these situations; in addition, I still had a long way to read before I’d reach the chapters providing any new storyline.  I sought to notify the author about this problem. Unfortunately for me, the author, and future readers, this book was traditionally published, and there was no “Contact me” source available.

So what is the criterion for a great book blurb?   The best way to write a book blurb is to aim for a minimum-spoiler description that centers on enticing reasons for reading the book. These enticements are relative to the genre, and authors need to beware of the expectations of the readers. Regardless of genre, the blurb should provide the kind of information and emotion that makes readers want to find out more about the story.

Book blurbs don’t have to be short in order not to be blabby.  Study the blurbs of books written in your genre or in the genres you like to read. Study long ones, medium ones, and short ones. Examine whether or not they are too blabby. If they aren't and yet they urge you to learn more about the book, determine exactly why that is the case.

Afterwards, here’s your homework: Once you understand how to create a persuasive book description, decide how you would rewrite the example presented here.  Consider how many of the details provided could have been left out while still sharing enough about the story to interest readers.  Alternatively, you can skip over to your own book. With your newly acquired expertise on how to write a book blurb, determine whether or not yours is one of those blabby ones in need of a good revision.